Warning: being a total girl in this one ;-)

(yet another warning: I have a lot going on in my mind so I'll probably be all over the place in this email...that's ok, I know you understand me). Ok, so recently the topic of marriage has literally been THROWN in my face from every direction. Well, I'm a firm believer that not everything is a coincidence and that sometimes God can be super obvious in getting my attention...all I need to do is pay attention instead of saying things like, "eh, well, it's almost valentines day, so it makes sense it's on the minds of everyone around me, excuse, excuse, etc. etc...." Well, alright, going to pay attention. Seriously though, I can't turn on the TV without there being SOMETHING where a wedding is involved...celeb InStyle weddings, or how every one of my favorite TV shows has some wedding or proposal involved, oh and then a new friend just randomly recommends and buys me a book all about marriage, and then I go to church on Sunday and the sermon is about Jesus' first miracle where He turns water into wine at a wedding ceremony, and then I have my cousin getting married soon, and I'm a bridesmaid in one of my closest friend's weddings coming up in June...MY WORD....EVERY DIRECTION. LOL...it's actually kinda funny because those of you who know me, know that I've never been a girl that super fantasizes about weddings...actually, in the past, the thought of marriage shot a huge feeling of fear into my heart and left me crippled at the thought. Funny how things can change isn't it (Psalm 34:4...this is my verse for sure these days)? Well, I really feel like it's time to pay attention to what the Lord is teaching me. No, I'm NOT saying that I'll be marching down the aisle any time soon....what I'm saying is that I truly feel God is bringing me deeper into my relationship with Him. He wants me to see Him not only as His daughter, but as His bride (ok, I understand that may seem a little weird...father and husband...but let me explain). Well, I believe that in our relationship with the Lord ALL of our needs are met. Every single one. I also believe that God has created relationships on earth to be different and diverse pictures/applications of His love for us. He gives us friendships in order to give us hands on experience into the friendship part of our relationship He offers us in himself....the relationship of a father and child, and a mother and child show us yet another aspect of His love for us. The same goes for our relationships with authority over us....and a beautiful example (one of my favorites because of the level of intimacy) is the relationship between husband and wife. I feel that as we mature in our relationships with our Lord that we eventually embrace and experience all of these different types of love with God. It's all a process...a path to maturity. And it happens in so many different ways for different people. And humans are broken, especially when it comes to relationships with other people. For example, perhaps you didn't grow up with a father or mother....perhaps your spouse left you, or you didn't have any friends. ALL of these relationships make a difference in how we view our relationship with God. He has to heal us a lot in order for us to fully grasp the extent and depth of His love...and I don't think we EVER fully grasp it completely until we die and go be with Him. So anyways, I'm rambling. Basically, I can really feel the Lord teaching me about the most intimate form of His love...the love that is shown between husband and wife. Christ is described as the groom and the church (His people) as the bride many times in scripture, and it's pretty dang awesome if you ask me. Think about it.....the love a groom has for his bride...the moment she walks down the aisle and he sees her for the first time in her gown...looking the most beautiful she's looked...what is he thinking? It's safe to say he's pretty stoked....this is his bride...his beauty...his gift, and he loves her, and loves her intensely...he would do anything for her, he would die for her...she is his love, his life. This intensity and purity of love is what Jesus feels for us. When He looks at us He says, "YEEEESSS.....You are so beautiful....I would do anything for you! You are glorious, you are my treasure...my glorious bride!!!!" Ok ladies, I bet it's safe to say that's what you're hoping your husband says when he sees you walking down the aisle..well, that's because that desire is a part of us...God created us like that and He also wants to give you to a man that feels that. Don't EVER settle for someone who doesn't love you like that...who doesn't think you're the most beautiful and glorious gift he has ever been given and ever will be given on this planet. If a man you are with does not make you feel valued, forget that man. Anyways, I believe this picture of God's love for us, as His bride is the most important and the most lost (healthy marriages are hard to find these days...the enemy is on a mission to break down the most beautiful picture of God's love, which then hurts all others). I will argue that because of this, your relationship with your spouse is the MOST important relationship you will EVER have on this earth, yes more important than your relationship with your children (although, I am not saying that is not important...it is, but I still think your marriage relationship should be your priority...if your marriage is healthy, then your relationships with your children will be healthy as well...and it will also teach your children how to have a healthy relationship with their spouse....which then shapes a huge part of their perspective on how they view God...so yes, important). Wow, I'm totally going on and on.....so yeah, there's where I am right now in my relationship with God. A couple of months ago He reaffirmed His place as my wonderful compassionate father, and now He's showing me an even deeper and more intimate view of His love for me....the way a husband loves his bride...and I freaking love it and think it's beautiful. Praise God for He truly is amazing...how deep is His love for us....I love how every need that I will ever have is met in Him. May you all experience how deeply and truly He loves you and longs to be with you. He's calling to you maybe not super loudly, but He's there....telling you He loves you and wants to show you His love...He wants to show you how valuable you are to Him, how you are His treasure. You may know all this, but now is the time to experience it. As Jon Edwards says, "You know that honey is sweet, but have you tasted it's sweetness?!" May you taste the sweetness and depth that is His love for us. Thanks for listening to my rant. I love you all. :-)

Oh, and one more thing. Guys, I know it may be hard to picture yourself as a bride...but just think...don't you want to love your bride that way? Do you love her that way (if you're married). Now take that love you felt/will feel when you saw/see your bride walk down the aisle (wanting to protect her, give her everything, every need, every joy, value her, make her feel and know she's beautiful, even die for her if need be) and multiply that love by a giant number, and THAT is how much God loves you. Believe me, you may not be able to relate to being a bride, but you CAN relate to the intensity of that love.

"O taste and see that the Lord is good; How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!"
Psalm 34:8

becka, I thought you'd appreciate this posting more than most. I love you my dear sweet friend, and it is through you that I've learned a lot of what I was yapping about in this post. You are one of the most beautiful people I know...don't ever settle.